Take Me Back
by pixiecorn
Summary: Buffy’s once passionate marriage is now falling apart in front of her eyes. Can her mother put to rest her fears of starting a family and can an old leather bound photo album help spark memories of the woman she once was?
1. I was 7 and you were 9

****

Chapter 1:

i _She said, I was seven and you were nine_

I looked at you like the stars that shined

In the sky, the pretty lights

And our daddies used to joke about the two of us

Growing up and falling in love and our mamas smiled

And rolled their eyes and said oh my my my /i

Buffy really wasn't in the mood for confrontations after the night she'd just had. Thoughts of the fight she'd had with her husband plaguing not only her dreams but also her mind whilst she was awake.

Her spirits dropped even further as she heard the impatient knocking coming from her front door. She peered through the small whole in the door to see who it was and with a sigh, hesitantly opened the door.

Her mother stood, a frown marring her features, an unimpressed expression coming to her face when Buffy greeted her with a false smile.

"Hello, Mom."

"What happened this time?"

"Hello Buffy. It's nice to see you to." Buffy sarcastically retorted, her voice a mimic of what Joyce's would sound like had she been her normal, cheery self.

Her mother's only retort was to frown at her in disapproval. Letting her hand slip from holding the door open, she gave her mother access into her home. i _'You're in deep shit this time, Buffy,' _/i she thought, knowing all too well her mother was going to give her a stern talking to.

It wasn't too hard for Buffy to figure out that William had gone to stay at her mother's last night. Oh he was in for a gob full from her when he came home.

i _'If he comes home at all,' _/i Buffy sullenly thought.

"Don't get shirty with me. You almost made him cry! What did you do this time?" Joyce's eyes narrowed as she followed Buffy into the lounge room, seating herself on her daughter's rather uncomfortable brown couch.

Buffy felt her heart lurch at the thought of making William cry. It was never her intention to hurt him.

"We had another fight," she shrugged, feeling that her mother had no right to butt into a marital fight between her and her husband.

"I gathered."

"Look I really don't want to get into this with you right now." Buffy rubbed her temples as she leant against the doorway to the lounge room. "I had a restless night an-"

"Why can't you just give him a child?"

"I really don't think that's any of your business, Mom," Buffy ground out, folding her arms across her chest.

"It becomes my business, when my b **son-in-law **/b ends up completely b **wasted **/b on my doorstep for the b **third **/b time this month!" Joyce's voice rose, cutting off Buffy before she could say anything. "You've known each other for 18 years, been dating since you were 18 and married for 2 years. b **What** /b are you so afraid of?" Her voice was but a whisper now as Joyce scanned Buffy's face, finding it void of any emotion. "William b **loves **/b you. Why is having a child so daunting to you?"

"I don't know, Mom!" Buffy yelled, running a shaky hand through her hair. She pushed away from the wall and started to pace back and forth in front of her mother. "I'm just not ready yet."

"When are you going to be ready? When you're pushing on forty?" Joyce's exclaimed, remembering how distraught William had been last night, mumbling incoherently about his marriage to Buffy and yet another fight they had had.

"I'm going to be a terrible mother," Buffy wailed, her shoulders shaking as a flood of tears streamed from her puffy eyes and slipped down her now red cheeks.

"Oh honey," Joyce whispered, standing up and wrapping Buffy in her embrace before bringing her to sit next to her on the lumpy brown couch. "You'll be an amazing mother."

"I killed my gold fish and almost stepped on my cat. I can barely look after myself." Buffy's eyes were wide. "I have a bad job and hardly any money. How can I have a baby when I can only just afford to look after myself?"

"Sweetie," Joyce laughed, wiping the tears from Buffy's cheeks, "You're not alone in this, or in your fears. I went through exactly the same thing, except I was already pregnant with you and wasn't going to give you up."

"Really?"

"Yes. I'm not going to say things are going to be easy. You can't even possibly think about bringing a baby into this world with the way your marriage is now. You need to work things through with William and fix your marriage."

Joyce smiled softly, patting Buffy's knee.

"Mom, there's nothing wrong wit-"

Joyce shot Buffy a menacing look that said 'Are you kidding?' before she spoke.

"When your husband spends most nights down at the local pub getting drunk and working later hours instead of being at home with you, then there's something wrong. Believe me, I know." Joyce sighed, seeing the defeated look come across Buffy's face. She stood slowly and made her way around the small coffee table in the middle of the lounge room to one of the two bookshelves Buffy had.

"I'm a bad wife."

"No you're not! You just need to find the passion again. The love you both once shared for each other." Joyce smiled, remembering how Buffy and William used to be, as she let her eyes scan up and down the first bookcase.

"What are you looking for?" Buffy asked, folding her legs underneath herself.

"The photo album I gave you as a wedding present."

Joyce scanned the first bookcase and finding no album there, she started scanning the second bookcase. "Ah," she exclaimed, grinning as she plucked the worn out leather-bound photo album from its place on the top shelf.

"I've seen the photos a thousand times before, Mom..." Buffy sighed, slipping further back into the couch, feeling more miserable than she had felt the night before.

After William had left she had cried for hours. After her tears had finally stopped she had made her way into their bedroom and wrapped herself in their sheets. They used to hug once, used to kiss and touch each other. Not any more.

Buffy had cried again then, knowing she'd been a key factor in letting her marriage to William fall apart.

"Yes. But when was the last time you actually looked at them?" Joyce was met with silence as she seated herself next to Buffy once again. "I remember it like it was yesterday, you know," she smiled undoing the tie that held the photo album closed.

"I really don't need a trip down memory lane. This isn't going to help. It was just another fight. Everything will be fine whe…" she was cut off by her mother.

"Everything will b **not** /b be fine until you fix things with your husband."

Joyce's voice was stern and made Buffy sit up a little straighter with nerves. Her mother only used that tone with her when she was young and in a lot of trouble.

"You need to look at these photo's and remember what you and William once shared. How the two of you got to where you are today. Then young lady," Joyce placed the now open photo album in Buffy's lap, "You need to sit back and think if this is the life you want."

She stood and grabbed her purse and keys.

"You two really were a match made in heaven and I won't stand by watching your marriage fall apart because you have a few unresolved issues."

"I'm not ready for a baby, Mom." Buffy sighed, not looking at the photo that was on the front page of the album.

"You may not be ready for a baby and I understand that. William loves you, but your marriage is falling apart, sweetie. He won't wait forever for you to figure out if he's what you really want. You need to fix things before you make any more fatal mistakes."

"I know." Buffy whispered, glancing down, not meeting her mother's pitiful gaze.

"You were seven," Joyce whispered as she walked towards the front door to let herself out, country air filling her senses as the wind brushed through the open door. "And he was nine."

Taking one last glance at Buffy before she left, Joyce smiled softly watching a smile tug at the edges of Buffy's lips as she traced the outline of a nine year old William Giles.

………………………………...

b **18 years ago **/b

William Giles held a hand above his eyes, shielding them from the harsh rays of the sun as he walked up the pathway to his new home.

His family had just moved from London, England to Sunnydale, California and he was still adjusting to the heat. He took a quick glance at his surroundings before walking indoors and down the hall to his room.

He had lived on acreage back home in London but seeing the different countryside California offered, he had immediately been entranced. The house in which his mother Jenny, his father Rupert and he moved into was right next door to the Summers reservation.

Of all the houses in the area that were up for sale, William had never seen his father so enthused and adamant about buying a particular house. Looking out his bedroom window now, he understood why.

Although both houses were close to each other, not like most country houses where your neighbour was a few 100 metres down the road, their backyard was 500 acres. There were gates between the paddocks that linked their acreage with the Summers'.

Nine year old William smiled as he surveyed the green country. Trees stood tall and swayed in the breeze. William's eyes narrowed to a squint as he tried to make out the movement in the far paddock. Picking his glasses up from the bedside table his father had assembled for him an hour ago, he glanced once again out the window.

William's eyes brightened seeing horses galloping freely in the paddock.

"William!" his father's voice called from the yard out the front.

"Coming!" he yelled back, stepping away from the window to rush down the hall and out onto the driveway. Boxes were lined and stacked everywhere, more of their belongings having been delivered from London by truck only minutes before.

"Ah, here he is." Giles said, watching his wife, run a hand through William's scruffy brown curly locks.

"Buffy, this is William." Jenny smiled, gesturing towards William.

"Hello!" Buffy smiled, her voice full of enthusiasm as she rushed from her mother's side to stand in front of William.

"Buffy, why don't you go show William your tree house while we help the Giles' carry their boxes inside?" Hank, Buffy's father, offered.

"Ok." Buffy grabbed William's hand before he could utter a word of protest and dragged him around the side gate of her house.

"You really don't have to-" Jenny started, only to be cut off by Giles.

"That one goes in the back room." Giles lifted his own box and showed Hank through the door.

"Oh my," Jenny sighed, sending Joyce a sympathetic glance.

"Don't worry about it," she laughed. "Hank doesn't mind at all. It's been a long time since anyone has been living next door to us and I think he'd enjoy the company of another male around."

"He really doesn't have to lug around our heavy boxes though," Jenny sighed, shaking her head as she watched Giles point to another box for Hank to carry, before picking up his own and once again walking through the front door.

"Come on," Joyce gestured for Jenny to follow. "I'll show you around a little."

They walked through the side gate where Buffy and William had walked through minutes before.

"It really is beautiful out here." Jenny smiled, breathing in the country air.

"It's beautiful once the sun starts setting over that hill, over there." Joyce pointed out. "And down the back paddock, over that little hill there," she pointed out into the distance, where the horses could be seen. "There's a lovely creek that flows through from the McCreedy reservation."

"You have to pump your legs out!" Buffy's giggling voice was heard as the two mothers made their way around the rest of the backyard until a huge tree came into view.

"Ah yes," Joyce laughed. "Buffy loves that tyre swing."

"William, you be careful now!" Jenny gasped seeing William sitting in the tyre, and Buffy trying her hardest to push him. There was only so much strength a seven year old girl's arms could pump out and pushing a nine year old boy didn't seem to be agreeing with her.

"How about you swing and I'll push you?" William asked, slipping from the swing when he heard his mother's concerned voice.

"Ok!" Buffy smiled, bouncing up and down, her pigtails swinging to and fro. She smiled, seeing the penetrating blue of his eyes before slipping into the tyre with ease. All too soon she was swinging back and forth, giggling as William pushed her higher.

"What's all the laughing about?" Hank asked coming around the corner, wiping the sweat from his brow.

"Just the kids dear." Joyce smiled as Hank wrapped his arms around her waist.

"Looks like they're quite content." Giles smiled, putting his arms around Jenny.

"I've never seen Buffy laugh this much," Hank said, smiling upon seeing Buffy so ecstatic at being pushed on the swing.

"Well let's hope that William keeps Buffy laughing for as long as we live here then."

"If he makes her laugh like that everyday, then I've no doubt she'll end up falling for him and marrying him." Hank laughed, shaking his head as he stepped away from Joyce.

"Oh my!" Joyce and Jenny simultaneously said, glancing back and forth between the grinning faces of their husbands, knowing all too well plans were forming in their heads about the children's futures.

"C'mon kid; time to feed Cole and the others," Hank yelled, breaking through Buffy's laughter.

"Yay!" Buffy smiled, slipping out from the tyre. She hugged William before running after her father as he walked down to the shed.

"Do you like the neighbours?" Hank asked as he slipped his hand into Buffy's.

"Yep." Buffy smiled, and ran to the shed, trying to pull her father with her. "William is going to be my bestest friend and he's going to be with me forever."

Buffy smiled, trying with all her might to pull one of the bails of hay from the pile in the corner to give to the horses.

"Is he now?" Hank smiled to himself. He shook his head, lifting the bail of hay with ease and loading it onto the front section of the four-wheeler motorbike.

Buffy plonked herself as far forward as she could on the cushioned part of the seat, allowing her father to sit behind her and start the engine. Hank shook his head at the simplistic view his daughter had on life. Oh how interesting the next few years were going to be.


	2. If I Dared You Now?

****

Chapter 2:

i _Take me back to the house in the backyard tree  
Said you'd beat me up, you were bigger than me  
You never did, you never did  
Take me back when our world was one block wide  
I dared you to kiss me and ran when you tried  
Just two kids, you and I...  
Oh my my my my _/i

Buffy was bought out of her trance by the front door opening and closing. William walked in, not saying a word to her he walked up the stairs to their room and gathered his things he would need for work.

Buffy heard a few things clatter to the floor in their room and her mind cringed at the thought of the fallen object.

Their wedding photo of the two of them in mid kiss as the paster pronounced them man and wife, laid face down on the hardwood floor.

Buffy's face fell when minutes later he walked back down the stairs, without uttering a word to her and left again. A lone tear fell down her cheek and onto the photo album in front of her.

i _'My marriage really is falling apart.' _/i Her mind whispered, her head lowering in defeat.

For moments she stared at the photo album in her hands before hesitantly flipping the page. She let out a strangled laugh at the photo she was met with. She must have been about 9 years old, making William 11. Herself, William and Xander all stood at the bottom of a ladder leading to her tree house. Xander was doing the bunny ears behind her head while William poked his tongue out towards her but she stood smiling brightly, her blonde hair in two piggy tails. Staring at the photo she was pulled in by the sudden memory of that day.

………………………………...

b**16 years ago **/b

"But it's b **my** /b tree house." Buffy's nine year old voice whined from her position at the bottom of the ladder that led up into her tree house.

"Yeah, bu' me and Xander are playin' in it." William smiled, folding his eleven year old arms across his chest, blocking Buffy from climbing the ladder to enter her tree house.

"No girls allowed," yelled Xander out from the tree house window. Xander was William's best friend at school and the two often spent every weekend together. Xander's parents were alcoholics and the boy had come to feel somewhat like a brother to William. The brother he never had but had always wanted.

"I'm allowed to play in it if I want." Buffy growled trying to push William out of the way, William however decided otherwise. With his arms he grabbed Buffy and pulled her away from the ladder, Xander all the while laughing from the tree house.

"No girls 'llowed."

"OW!" Buffy wrenched her arms free of his grasp and glared at him hard. Xander was still giggling from the tree house and Buffy shot him a deafening glare.

"Tha's wha' you get for trying to get into our b boys only /b tree house. I'll do it again." William poked his tongue out at Buffy before turning to walk back to the ladder.

Buffy beat him there and started to climb as fast as her little legs would go.

"Hey!"

"William!" William cringed hearing his mother's stern voice calling from the backdoor to the Summers' house. "You let Buffy play as well young man; you too Xander."

"Yes, Mrs. Giles." Xander sighed out, glaring at Buffy as she stepped through the door to the tree house, a grin spread across her face.

"Why'd you have to go do tha' for?" William sighed as he too stepped through the doorway and into the tree house.

"It's my tree house." Buffy pressed. "I'm allowed to play here if I want." She defiantly crossed her arms across her chest.

"Yeah, but now it's going to be boring." Xander whined, pouting slightly.

"Would you kid's like some snacks." Joyce yelled from the bottom of the ladder.

There was a hasty rush to scramble down the tree to where Joyce had laid the food out on a small fold out table. Jenny joined them now, sitting in one of the many chairs Joyce had brought out.

"William, don't throw your food." Jenny sighed softly; her son was hard to control most days.

"This is no fun." William grumbled, plonking himself into a chair next to Xander. He glanced at Buffy who sat happily munching on a lamington, its crumbs falling across her lap and the table top.

"Buffy, would you like a photo?" Her mother asked, holding a camera in her hands.

Buffy had a fascination with photographs and often made Joyce document everything. Most often than not Buffy would have at least 3 photo's taken everyday of her doing something, whether it was riding her black horse Cole or sitting on her fathers four wheel motorbike, to standing at the bottom of her tree house.

"Yes!"

"William, Xander; would you mind getting in the photo too?" Joyce asked, standing across from Buffy. Both boys grumbled and reluctantly trudged over to where Buffy was standing, a smile on her face.

"Well that's sure going to be a funny photo." Jenny laughed, making Buffy turn to glare at the two boys next to her and what they were doing.

Her eyes narrowed and she poked her tongue out at William before stomping back to the fold out table to finish her lamington.

………………………………...

b **Present day **/b

Buffy shook her head, smiling to herself as the memory finished. Reluctantly she stood with the photo album like glue in her hands as she made her way up the stairs to have a shower. Friday's were her days off work and she was looking forward to relaxing after the night she'd had last night. Her thoughts of the previous nights fight with William still fresh in her mind.

After her shower and not feeling like going outside she dressed in her red silk night gown that stopped mid thigh and slipped into bed. The photo album lay on her bedside table. Her hair was still damp and slowly soaking her pillow but Buffy didn't care as her eyes drifted shut, heavy with sleep.

She dreamed of times when everything was simple, when her life made sense, when she knew who she was and what she wanted to be. More importantly she dreamed of who she wanted, who she lived for. William was her light when all lights had gone out, in darker times he had held her above everything.

She didn't realise she had subconsciously reached out to gather Williams pillow into her arms as she slept, breathing in his scent deeply.

Buffy woke hours later, stretching her arms above her head. She quickly glanced at the clock on William's side of the bed and had to do a double take. Was it really 6 o'clock? She's slept the day away.

She was jolted out of her hazy state by hearing the running water coming from the bathroom. William was home and in the shower. Her heart rate sped up. What was she going to say to him?

Not wanting to deal with the situation at present, Buffy reached for the photo album and propped a few spare pillows behind her back so she could sit up. She flipped to the page she had reached last and smiled, briefly remembering the tree house again before turning the page and let out a laugh.

She stared down at her younger self; she was about 11 years old in this particular photo and had a look of horror and uttermost shock on her face. She traced the outline of a 13 year old William, smiling all the while.

William's hands were resting on Buffy's shoulders as he puckered his lips, leaning in for a kiss. Buffy had screamed in his face and started running down to the back paddock. Her father, Buffy shook her head smiling to herself, had taken this candid photo, laughing to himself the whole time.

"Now there's a smile I haven't seen in a long time, Pet." William whispered, his British accent coming out thick, a soft smile marring his face.

Buffy glanced up from the photo and her heart stopped. No matter how many times she saw William in a towel, water droplets falling from his wet hair and down his chest to his chiselled abs and then lower into the small line of hair that left little to the imagination as to what lay beneath it, she always seemed to be stunned.

"I found some photos." Was all Buffy could say, still staring at him. She lifted her gaze from his abdominals to rest on his face and blushed when she saw him smirking. It had been weeks since either of them had touched each other.

Most nights when they went to bed, they would both roll to their respective sides of the bed and not move towards the other all night. Buffy sighed sadly thinking how utterly pathetic her life had become.

i _'How could I be so stupid.'_/i Her mind whispered.

"Photo's of what?"

Buffy's eyes bugged out of her head as he walked to their dresser and turned, his back facing her and pulled the towel from his hips. She was met with two extremely white buns and a blush crept up her face. Even his backside was sexy.

"Pet?"

"Huh?" Buffy shook her head, breaking herself from the stare. "Just photo's of us when we were younger." She tilted her head to the side, watching as he pulled on a pair of boxers.

i_'What? You have to look at it from different angles.' _/i She thought to herself.

"Ah, to be young again." William smiled, slowly walking over to the bed and hesitantly sitting down next to Buffy. "Can I see?" He held out his hands, waiting for her to pass him the photo album.

His laughter broke Buffy once again from her trance and she looked down to see him laughing at the photo she had been, minutes before laughing at too.

"I remember that," his whisper was soft and held the smallest hint of a smile in it.

"I dared you to kiss me," Buffy smiled, glancing at his face. He was smiling at her. Smiling; he hadn't smiled at her like that in a long time and it sent a wave of butterflies through her stomach.

All thoughts of the fight they'd had the previous night left her mind; leaving the two of them completely alone.

Hesitantly he raised a hand to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, his hand resting on her cheeks for a moment before he spoke.

"And when I tried you ran away." Buffy laughed softly her mind racing, her heart beating a million miles a minute.

"What if I dared you now?" Buffy whispered, meeting his gaze. His hand stroked her cheek as he bent his face lower to hers.__

"Will you run?" he whispered, shifting closer to her.

Buffy's heart was racing as she answered him in a whisper so soft he almost missed it.

"No."

"Buffy-"

"I'm sorry about last night, I just-"

"Don't ruin the moment." William intercepted, placing his forehead against hers.

"I'm sorry." Buffy whimpered, her eyes rimming with tears before William's lips crashed down to meet hers in an urgent kiss.

There was no gentleness about the kiss, it was hard and forceful and full of passion. Buffy wound her arms around William's neck, pulling him closer to her. Her heart was racing and her stomach fluttered. Too many nights had she gone without his sensual touch that caressed her body, she vowed to herself then that she would not let her marriage fall apart. William was too important to her.

"I love you." She kissed his neck and his shoulders and was met with silence. Hesitantly she pulled back, her stomach dropping at the thought of him rejecting her love.

"Do you know how long I've waited for you to say that to me again?" William whispered, kissing her lips softly.

"Too long," Buffy stated placing a hand softly on his cheek, William only nodding in response before he captured her lips in another searing kiss.

They had slipped down the bed from their once sitting position and were now lying side by side, facing each other. Buffy gasped when he lift her left leg and pulled it over his hip, his groin coming into contact with hers. He kissed his way to her neck and suckled on her earlobe, kissing the tender flesh behind and beneath her ear.

He'd always known how to push her buttons.

"I'm sorry about last night." Buffy gasped into his ear as his hand on her thigh moved to caress her rounded cheek, slipping her red silk nightie up and over her hips.

"Me too," he huskily whispered into her ear. "I'll wai' for you. No more pressure. You mean to bloody much to me, Pet."

Buffy's response to that was a smile as she brought his had to her face. "Thank-you." she said before bringing his lips down to meet hers. Their tongues came out to play and Buffy slipped the leg over his hip higher and let out a moan at the intimate contact his member made with her groin.

William cupped her backside and rolled onto his back allowing Buffy to sit astride him, straddling him. This only made them both moan in pleasure at the new position.

Without uttering a word Buffy started to lift her nightie off only to be stopped by William's hands on hers. His eyes spoke 'let me' and she did. He sat up, his hands slipping the nightie up her stomach and he smiled when she lift her arms, allowing him to remove the garment from her body and fling it to the other side of the room.

Her hair caressed her back and she let her head drop back when William took her nipple into his mouth. Her hips rocked against his, fuelling both their fires all the more. Buffy reached down with her hands and grabbed the edges of his boxer shorts.

William laid back down and lift his hips, allowing Buffy to slip his boxer shorts effortlessly down his hips. Once he was free of his boxers William flipped them over, kissing his way down her body until he reached her knickers.

He always did like the lacy scraps of material she covered herself with and Buffy couldn't help but smile when she heard him breath in her scent before he slipped the offending garment down her thighs.

Before Buffy could utter a word of protest William was licking and suckling her quim making Buffy gasp. It wasn't too long before she pulled him up her body and helped him position himself at her entrance.

Their lovemaking was hard and fast, both wanting to fuel the fire that had long been burnt out for weeks before. After they both climaxed they lay side by side smiling at each other. Buffy's hair was stuck to her sweaty forehead and William brought his hand up and brushed it from her face.

"I love you," Buffy whispered, kissing William softly on the lips one last time before pulling away.

"I've always loved you." His words spoke volumes and Buffy closed her eyes briefly remembering the photo album that lay somewhere amongst their now messy floor.

"We were just kids."

"I've loved you since the moment I laid eyes on you," he kissed her cheek. "And I doubt I'll ever stop."

Their kiss this time was slow and languid and Buffy couldn't help but let a lone tear slip from her closed eyes as she finally came to understand the lengths in which Williams love for her reached.

She would try to fix things, repair the damage that had been done. Buffy vowed that over the weekend she would spend every possible moment with William, rekindling their marriage and turning it into a relationship they'd once had.


	3. I Think I Lied

**Chapter 3:**

i _Well, I was sixteen when suddenly  
I wasn't that little girl you used to see  
But your eyes still shined like pretty lights  
And our daddies used to joke about the two of us  
They never believed we'd really fall in love  
And our mamas smiled and rolled their eyes  
And said oh my my my... /i_

It was hours later when Buffy woke in the middle of the night with a grumbling tummy. Sitting up in bed she vaguely recalled not having eaten dinner that night. With a smile on her lips, she turned to face the reason why she hadn't eaten anything.

William was laying belly down on their bed, a grin playing on the edges of his mouth. His blonde locks were dishevelled and Buffy had to shake her head, pushing away the memory of her hands running through those soft locks only hours before.

Blushing, she reached onto the floor, running her hands around the surface until she found her silk robe. She slipped from beneath the sheets silently and tied the ribbon of her robe around her waist before exiting the room as quietly as possible.

It wasn't until she was halfway through making her omelette, eggs being the only form of food in the house besides some milk that had been sitting in the fridge for God knows how long, that she realised not only hadn't she eaten but she hadn't fed her horse Cole as well as William's horse Dawn either.

Buffy flicked the stove off and slipped on her boots. She was halfway to the front door when William slipped his arms around her waist.

"Where are you nicking off to in the middle of the night?" His voice tickled her ear and sent a wave of shivers down her spine.

"I was hungry and cooking an omelette. I- I didn't feed the horses," Buffy stuttered out when William slipped his hands into the front of her robe, where her tie had loosened, leaving her robe partly open.

"Sweetheart…"

Buffy's breath caught in her throat when William started suckling on her ear.

"They live in a paddock that's full of grass. I'm sure one night of no' having horse feed won' do them any harm." His hands were splayed across her stomach, drawing lazy patterns as Buffy's breath came in short pants. "Come back to bed, Pet."

"I'm starving and am going to finish making my omelette."

It took all of Buffy's willpower not to turn around and crush herself to William, but the rumblings in her stomach once again signalled how hungry she really was.

She turned anyway and let out a startled gasp to see William hadn't put anything on before he came downstairs, she tilt her head to the side.

"See something you like, Pet?"

Buffy licked her lips before lifting her head to meet his intense gaze. She smiled brightly, nodding briefly before walking back to the kitchen where she turned the stove back on to finish making her omelette.

She heard William come into the kitchen and turned around to find where he was standing, which happened to be right behind her, now in front.

"I think," he started, his hands resting on her waist, "seeing as I'm completely starkers," he started to untie her robe, "you should be too."

Buffy however, had other ideas and raised her spatula to slap his hands away.

"Ah ah ah! This omelette isn' ready to be flipped yet, luv."

Buffy only smiled in response and turned around, her back to him.

"No. But mine is and I'm hungry."

"You're no fun."

Buffy could hear the pout in his voice and imagined the fold of his bottom lip as he pouted. Sometimes he was too cute for his own good.

Buffy couldn't figure it out. Yesterday they had been yelling words of hate at each other and now they were back to being a loving couple. What had her mother said to William last night?

After finishing her omelette and crawling back into bed, Buffy had a dreamless sleep. She tossed and turned, thoughts of what tomorrow would bring plaguing her mind. William slept soundlessly, his arms wrapped around her, encasing her in his warmth.

In the morning Buffy slipped from his arms quietly and grabbed her clothes before tiptoeing to the bathroom. She showered and dressed quickly and let her wet hair hang out around her shoulders, not bothering with any makeup. She rushed downstairs and flicked the kettle on, hoping she'd be back in time to make herself and William a cup of coffee and sneak back upstairs before he noticed she had gone.

Buffy was walking swiftly towards the barn when she was met with a snort from her horse.

"I know, I know." Sometimes Cole could act positively human and at times Buffy was a little wigged out by the things he did. She reached the barn and pulled a bag of loosen and a bucket out. She could hear Cole's restless snorting and knew he was hungry, Dawn's neighing alerted her to the other horse's presence.

………………………………...............

William woke with a content smile on his face, he couldn't remember the last time he'd felt so at peace. He stretched his arms above his head and let out a groan as a few kinks worked their way out of his body. He spoke, turning his body to Buffy's side of the bed, only to be met with emptiness.

"Last nigh' was-" he sat up, eyebrows narrowing in confusion. William strained his ears and heard the faint click of the front door and what he assumed was Buffy cluttering around the kitchen.

His eyes scanned the room and William couldn't help but grin at seeing his clothes as well as Buffy's thrown about the room, items scattered everywhere and bed sheets half hanging from the bed. One item in particular stood out among all the rest and that was a very worn looking photo album.

William leant over the end of the bed to retrieve it and sat up swiftly, placing it on his bedside table when he heard Buffy's light footsteps on the stairs.

"Hey, you." She opened the door with a soft smile, her hands holding a coffee mug in each hand.

"Morning, pet." William grinned, slipping a few pillows behind his back as he propped himself against the headboard.

"I didn't wake you up, did I?" Buffy asked, hesitantly sitting down on the side of the bed next to William, not sure how to act after last night.

"No. I only jus' woke up." William smiled gently, seeing her nervousness as he accepted the coffee mug from Buffy. He took a sip before sitting the mug down next to the photo album on his bedside table.

"I was feeding the horses."

"Ah," William laughed hearing the guilt in Buffy's voice for not having fed them the previous day.

"Cole wasn't very happy with me," she pouted, taking a sip of her own coffee.

"I swear you love tha' horse more than me sometimes, Pet," William teased, meeting Buffy's gaze.

"I-I do love you," Buffy replied shakily, not sure if William was really teasing her or not. "Please don't think I don't. I know I haven't said it a lot lately a-and that I…. I love you," she whispered out the last words, her gaze locked on his.

"C'mere, Pet." William held his hands out for Buffy to take and pulled her onto his lap and into his arms as soon as she placed her mug next to his. Buffy snuggled into his embrace and tucked her head under his chin.

William kissed the top of her head, savouring the feel of her in his arms before speaking.

"I know you love me, Pet. You don't have to explain it to me wh-"

"But I do," Buffy cut in. "I've been so horrible lately. We fight everyday and you're never here." Tears were rimming Buffy's eyes as she spoke.

"It takes two to fight, luv. I haven't exactly been the best husband."

Buffy sat up to look William in the eyes.

"But I'm the one not giving you what you want. I'm a bad wife. I-"

"Buffy," William whispered, silencing her. "You're not a bad wife." He kissed her softly on the lips. "If waiting to start a family is going to make you happy then I'll do it. I won' ever force you to do something you don't wan' to do."

"Thank you," she whispered, snuggling back into his chest. They sat like that for a few minuets, Buffy listening to the soft beating of his heart, watching his chest rise and fall as he breathed.

"I think I lied," William laughed, a thought coming to his mind.

Buffy tensed, unsure of what he was going to say next.

"I did make you do something you didn't want to."

"You did?" Buffy asked, sitting up in his lap.

"When you were sixteen," William smiled, trailing a hand down her spine. "You had the most gorgeous hair, luv."

Buffy smiled, remembering how long her hair had been when she was sixteen. Almost touching her waist. The memory of what William had forced her to do was blank in her mind and William, seeing her confused look, reached for the photo album.

"I'm sure your mother put it in here. Ah, here." William flipped through the album until he came to the photo he was looking for. Buffy turned the album around in his arms and smiled, letting out a snort.

She was sitting on Cole in her saddle, a bright smile lighting up her face as the wind blew her hair out behind her. Cole was standing in front of the Giles' house, not too far from the front porch where William was standing, his jaw dropped in shock.

"I still think this is the most hilarious look I've ever seen captured on film," Buffy laughed, tracing the outline of his face in the photo.

"Can you blame me, look at what you're wearing!" William exclaimed, pointing to 16 year old Buffy's outfit.

"A pair of shorts and a singlet?" Buffy asked, eyebrow raised as she met William's eyes.

"You're a tease, Summers," William smirked, slipping the album from her hands and dropping it to the floor as he flipped them and pushed her into the mattress.

"Yeah, but you love me." Buffy smiled, gazing into his eyes.

"Yeah, pet, I do." Smiling, William gently kissed Buffy on the lips before sitting back up and pulling into his embrace.

"Do you remember our dads that day? What they were saying about us?" Buffy asked, a knowing smile on her face.

"Vaguely. Mum told me a bit afterwards," William nodded, recalling their fathers talking together.

……………………………….................................

b **9 Years ago **/b

"You should have seen them sweetheart, they looked so-"

Joyce Summers was cut off by her husband.

"What? In love?" He let out a scoff. "That'll be the day, Buffy falling in love with William."

"I think I agree. Do you not recall her saying she would not kiss him even if he was the last person on the planet?" Giles asked.

Jenny, Joyce, Hank and Giles were all sitting in the Giles' backyard around a table having afternoon tea whilst Buffy and William were off riding their horses.

"Yes, but-"

"He's dating a very strange girl at the moment. Drusilla something," Giles said, eyes slanted. "He's changed Joyce, have you not seen his hair?"

"It's very bright," Joyce nodded in answer.

"I don't know," Jenny smiled softly. "When you see them together, Buffy and William I mean, they seem so happy, so-"

"In love," Hank laughed, shaking his head in disbelief. "Buffy's never gone back on her word and she did say she'd never kiss him even if he was the last man on the planet."

"I think our wives are planning for them to get married and live happily ever after." Giles laughed.

"Oh my," Jenny and Joyce both whispered, shaking their heads at their husbands' immaturity.

William or Spike as he had told them both so many times was his new name, looked at Buffy as if she was the only one in the room. Hank and Giles might not see it but they both knew.

"What can you do, eh?" Jenny laughed, sipping her tea, ignoring her husband's and Hank's immature conversation.

No one knew that at that very moment William 'Spike' and Buffy were having a heated argument down in the back paddock.

_  
_"You don't know anything!" Buffy yelled, letting go of Cole's reins and letting him toddle over to a rich patch of grass.

"You want me Summers, there's no point in denying it." Spike smirked, seeing the frustration he was causing Buffy.

"I wouldn't kiss you if you were the last man on the planet, William!"

"It's Spike now, luv." Spike took a step closer to Buffy, his chest almost touching hers. "What are you afraid of, Summers? 'fraid you're going to like it?"

"Y-you're full of yourself," Buffy stuttered when he slipped a hand around her back and pulled her flush against him.

"You want me, I can feel it, luv. I can see it in your eyes."

"I don't b **want **/b you. I have Riley."

"Farm boy's not good enough for you," Spike growled, pulling her flush against him, his hands on her hips almost bruising.

"Sure he is," Buffy smirked. "He's good enough to- mff"

Spike crashed his lips against hers in a rush. She would forget Riley soon enough, he was sure of it. His hands slipped from her hips, one coming to the back of her head, the other resting on her bottom and squeezing.

Buffy let out a gasp. Riley had never done that.

Spike took advantage of her gasp and let his tongue slip into her mouth, smiling when Buffy let out a moan. Her struggles of protest became less and less and Spike smirked.

It was only when Buffy started to wound her arms around his neck that she realised that not only did she have a boyfriend, but he had a girlfriend.

Drusilla. Her eyes narrowed. She was a vapid ho. Buffy pushed away from Spike and walked to Cole, hopping into the saddle as fast as she could.

"You cant deny you want me, luv." Spike smirked, slowly sauntering over to his horse, Dawn.

"Go back to your girlfriend, Spike," Buffy said icily before kicking her heels into Cole's hide and shooting off.

"Buffy!" Spike yelled, not having the time to tell Buffy that he and Dru had broken up a week ago.

It wasn't long after that that Spike had met Harmony. She lasted for a while, sating Spike's needs of wanting Buffy but never being able to have her. Harmony was almost a dead ringer of Buffy, her hair anyway. Blowjobs were always the best from her.

……………………………….............

b **Present **/b

"You may have made me do something I didn't want to do." Buffy climbed onto Williams lap, straddling him. "But you were," she kissed and nipped at his neck, his hands resting on her bottom, "an amazing kisser." She met his gaze, a smirk on her lips. "Spike."

"You haven' called me that in a long time, pet," William smirked, cupping her bottom, pulling her body further up his lap, sitting her astride his member.

"It's a very sexy name." Buffy smiled, running a hand through his bleached locks. It had been a while since he'd dyed it and had it cut and his regrowth was showing. "I liked it."

"I know." William smirked. "I seem to remember you calling it out a lot. More like screaming it actually."

"William!" Buffy blushed, raising a hand to her face.

"It's Spike, luv," William said before crushing his lips to hers.


	4. My Only and Always

**b Chapter 4: /b**

i _Take me back to the creek beds we turned up  
Two A.M. riding in your truck and all I need is you next to me  
Take me back to the time we had our very first fight  
The slamming of doors instead of kissing goodnight  
You stayed outside till the morning light  
Oh my my my my _/i

It was late afternoon when Buffy started tacking up Cole. She hadn't ridden him in what seemed like weeks when in truth it had been only 5 days. With a smile on her lips, Buffy shook her head, listening as Cole let out a pleased snort as she slipped his bridle on.

"Are you going to be good for me today?" Buffy asked, patting his neck, getting another snort in response.

"He's always good for you. Dawn on the other hand…" William let out frustrated sigh as he came to stand next to his horse. Her saddle was heavy in his arms and a frown marred his features, as he watched the blanket he'd just placed on her back fall to the ground.

"Looks like she doesn't want to be ridden today." Buffy laughed, watching as William placed the saddle on the nearby fence, and lifted the blanket back onto Dawn. As soon as he turned to pick up the saddle, Dawn swung her neck around and pulled the blanket off with her teeth, snorting at William when he turned to face her again.

"Looks like." William nodded in response, a frown marring his features. It was unlike Dawn to not want to go for a ride. Normally when he came to the fence with her saddle in his arms she was neighing in delight. William shook his head and picked her blanket back up off the ground, shaking the dust from it.

"Want a ride?" Buffy asked, placing her left leg in the saddle's stirrup, lifting herself into the saddle.

William felt his cock twitch, watching Buffy's shorts slide up as she pulled herself into the saddle and swung her right leg around to rest on the other side.

"Why not, I don' particularly feel like walking all the way down to the creek." William smirked, watching Buffy slide forward on the saddle, letting William use the stirrups to pull himself up onto Cole.

Buffy settled herself back against William, her thighs touching his, her shorts riding up higher on her legs as William pulled her further back into him. They were both sitting as comfortable as two people on a single saddle could as they set off for the ride down to the creek.

When Buffy had suggested that they take a picnic down at the creek that afternoon, William hadn't been sure how to reply. He knew the last couple of months had been rough, both of them having started working longer hours, thus avoiding the arguments that always seemed to surface whenever they were spending any time together.

But something had changed recently.

After the last argument they'd had, William had spent the night at Buffy's mother's house.

Joyce was an amazing woman and always seemed to take care of his drunken self, pulling him somewhat out of his miserable state.

This time things had changed. Joyce had woken him up. Realisation had hit and William now finally understood how close he actually was to losing Buffy.

i "_She's not going to sit around and wait forever. You're losing her, William."_

"_She doesn' bloody care." William grumbled, a hand coming to rest across his eyes._

"_Of course she cares! She loves you! But it doesn't help that you're never at home. You don't talk to each other anymore. That's no way to have a marriage." Joyce sighed, frustrated._

"_She doesn' want kids with me."_

"_No bloody wonder." Joyce sighed. "Look at yourself. When you're not at work, you're at home arguing with her and when you're not at home arguing you're out getting completely drunk. That's not an environment to be raising a baby in." Joyce watched William raise his head to stare at her. "Do you love her?"_

"_What kind of question is that? Of course I bloody love her. She's my wife!"_

"_Well then, start acting like you love her!" Joyce yelled back. "I've been through this before, William and trust me, the more you pull back, the quicker she's going to leave. I won't have my baby girl hurt the way I was."_

"_I don' know if she loves me anymore. Last nigh' was a bad one." William sighed, tears forming in his eyes._

"_You need to sleep if off, William. I'll talk to her in the morning, but you need to promise me something." William nodded and Joyce continued, "I want you to promise me that you'll get her to smile again, get her to be who she was when you first got married. You were so happy." Joyce smiled. "I want to see both of you like that again."_

"_I can't promise you, Joyce but I'll try my hardest."_

"_And don't worry about the baby issue dear, you'll be having children down the track. I'll see to that, I need to spoil my grandchildren rotten." Joyce laughed, standing up._

"_Thanks again, Joyce."_

"_You're welcome anytime, William. You know that." _/i

"Are you awake back there?" Buffy laughed, turning in the saddle to gaze at William's face.

"Huh? Yeah, pet."

"You kinda zoned out there. Are you ok?" Buffy asked concerned.

"I'm fine, pet. Just thinking."

"Good thoughts, I hope?" Buffy laughed, tugging on Cole's reins to stop.

William glanced around at where they were and smiled. Buffy had led Cole to one particular creek bed he remembered quite well.

"All good thoughts when I'm with you, luv." He kissed her cheek and slid himself out of the saddle, holding an arm out to help Buffy down.

"I would think you'd have some rather nice thoughts of this place." Buffy smiled, a mischievous grin forming on her face as she unlatched the small picnic bag she'd packed from Cole's saddle and let the reins drop, allowing him to wander off to a nearby patch of grass.

"Oh I can think of one or two," William chuckled, sliding his arms around Buffy's waist, gently kissing the sensitive skin between her neck and shoulders.

"We certainly turned a few creek beds up, didn't we?" Buffy smiled, dropping the picnic bag and turning around, sliding her arms up and around William's neck.

William raised an eyebrow.

"My my," William smirked, "Did you bring me out here to seduce me and relive those memories, Mrs. Giles."

"Maybe," Buffy giggled nervously, her shoulders relaxing as William crushed his lips down on hers.

……………………………….....................

b **Six and a half years ago **/b

Eighteen year old Buffy let out a squeal as Spike chased her through the water again. It had come as a shock to their parents when the two had started dating six months ago. Their families worried about a true love relationship as they lived so close to each other, not to mention the two year age gap.

Hank had only laughed, and gloated to Joyce that he had foreseen the relationship from the beginning, helping to sway any of Joyce's doubts and fears over the issue.

Jenny had sighed extensively and given William, aka Spike, an hour long lecture on the correct way to treat a girl. After all, that's all Buffy was, just a little girl.

In the eyes of her parents anyway.

At eighteen she still hadn't had sex. Buffy let out a shudder at the thought of her previous boyfriend, Riley. He seemed to have found his pleasures elsewhere in their relationship when she had refused him several times.

Looking at Spike now as he caught up to her in the creek, gathering her into his arms, slipping slightly due to the water, Buffy couldn't help but smile.

He had been the prefect gentleman and sweetest person she had ever met. They'd made love for the first time only a few weeks ago, on the day of their six month anniversary and it had been amazing.

"What are you thinkin' about?" Spike asked, cupping Buffy's bottom in his hands, walking the short way to the creek bed where they had laid a picnic blanket out for the two of them to lay on.

"You," was Buffy's short reply, a smile on her face as she nipped at his lips.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," Buffy whispered softly as they fell down on the blanket, limbs tangled together.

They stared at each other for what seemed like hours, Spike leaning his forehead against hers.

"I love you so much."

"Spike…"

"I'll never stop, you know." At Buffy's confused look Spike continued, kissing her soundly on the mouth, "Loving you. You're my only and always."

"William…" Buffy whispered, tears forming in her eyes before she crashed her lips against his in a searing kiss.

They'd made love then, on the bank of the creek, the sun heating their already flushed skin. That was the first time they'd ever had unprotected sex.

A month later they'd had their first and one of their worst arguments.

…………………………..........................

b **Now** /b

If this was Buffy's way of fixing their broken marriage, William smiled to himself, lightly trailing his hand down Buffy's naked hip, he definitely wasn't complaining.

Buffy let out a moan, rolling over to be gathered into William's open and warm embrace.

"You never cease to amaze me." William smiled, prepping her cheek with light kisses.

"Neither do you." Buffy smiled, lifting her hand under her head to stare down at her husband. "This is a lot better than arguing."

"I hate arguing with you, pet." William whispered, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Me too," Buffy whispered with watery eyes.

"No more tears?" William sighed, wiping her damp cheeks. "How 'bout we both promise not to fight with each other again. And if we do feel pissed off with the other, we'll-" William was cut off by Buffy's tearful laugh.

"Have hot angry sex with each other?"

"I was going to say try and talk rationally, but hot angry sex works fine with me."

Buffy let out a laugh and let her head fall onto William's chest. He wrapped an arm around her waist and stroked his fingers through her hair with the other hand as Buffy watched the rhythmical rise and fall of his chest.

"We've always had problems talking to each other during an argument." Buffy sighed, her eyes shutting as William's breathing and strokes to her head lulled her near to sleep.

"We're both too hot headed. Both wanting to be right and not admitting to when we're wrong."

"Do you remember our first fight?"

"Yeah, pet. I do." William sighed sadly. That night had been one of the most painful nights of his life, both physically and mentally.

"I don't ever want to fight with you again," Buffy whispered, right before her eyes closed, and she let sleep take over.

………………………………................

b **Six years and Seven months ago **/b

"What do you mean you're late?"

"My period," Buffy started to hyperventilate. "I…It's late!" Her voice was hushed as she paced back and forth in front of Spike.

"So maybe it will come in a few days? Right?" Spike was starting to get nervous.

"No," Buffy shook her head, running a shaky hand through her already tussled hair. "I…it's never late."

"I'm sure it's nothing," Spike assured her, smiling softly as he grabbed her hand. "C'mere, pet."

"Are you even listening to me?" Buffy yelled, yanking her hand from his. She nervously glanced back at her house to make sure her mother wasn't watching them from the kitchen window. It was nightfall and Joyce always kept a watch on the two, making Buffy came inside as soon as 10:30pm hit. "I might be pregnant! Oh my god! I might be…" Her breaths were shallow and uneven.

Spike's heart rate sped up. He was too young to be a father.

"I'm too young to be a mother! I can't, I…" Buffy nervously ran both hands through her hair, pacing back and forth.

"If you are, we'll fix it."

Her head snapped up and her eyes shot to Spike's.

"Fix it?" Buffy asked icily.

"Yeah, have the pregnancy terminated," Spike swallowed deep, not liking the looks Buffy was sending him.

"You mean kill it… Kill an innocent human being." Buffy didn't need a verbal response to know Spike had meant ever word. "I could never…I would never kill…" She started to back away from Spike.

"Buffy, pet. I didn't mean-"

Buffy's eyes were full to the brim with tears, a few slipping down her cheeks.

"But you did!" She cried out, her heart breaking. "Which means you don't want this with me. Maybe not now but it means you don't want me…You don't…love me enough to have a family with me."

Buffy continued to back away and Spike felt his own eyes rimming with tears.

"I do sweetheart. I love you. You just said you didn't wan-"

"Stay away from me," Buffy cried, running into her house and slamming the door in Spike's face.

"Buffy, please!"

"Leave me alone!"

"Buffy, is everything alright?" Joyce asked, her face narrowing in concern the second she saw her daughter's tear-stained face.

"I just want to be left alone for a while," she whispered, wrapping her arms around herself.

Spike had slept on the porch all night, a small light above the back door illuminating his sleeping form. Joyce had crept out around 2am, laying a warm blanket over him and giving him a pillow before retreating back inside.

When morning light came, Buffy silently trudged down the stairs, her eyes red and puffy from crying. Joyce was in the kitchen, fixing herself a cup of coffee when Buffy entered the kitchen, glancing quickly at the back door.

"He's still outside, you know," Joyce said, raising her gaze to meet Buffy's surprised look.

"That boy loves you very much and you'd be extremely stupid to let that slip away because of one argument."

"Mom, I-"

"I didn't hear anything. But it's not hard to figure it out that you were fighting when you come home crying and lock your boyfriend out." Joyce handed Buffy a mug of coffee. "Go and talk to him, sweetie. I'm sure everything will be fine."

Buffy stepped outside and sat down silently next to Spike.

"Buffy, pet. I'm so sorry. I didn't mea-"

"I'm not." Buffy sighed, letting her gaze meet his.

"Not what?" Spike's heart was racing.

"I'm not pregnant." Tears slipped down her face as Spike gathered her into his arms. "I got my period this morning."

"I would never leave you on your own to deal with… I'm always going to be here, pet."

"I don't want to fight anymore," Buffy cried, slipping her arms around his waist.

"Me either. Always remember, pet." Spike placed a kiss to the top of her head. "You're my only and always. I love you so much."

"Oh my!" Joyce exclaimed, her jaw dropping slightly upon hearing her daughter's deep conversation with William. Her baby was growing up and was a woman now.

Her baby was sexually active.

Joyce placed her coffee mug and grabbed her car keys off the table, yelling out to Buffy that she was going to the store.

Buffy started the pill that week, easing Joyce's mind of any children.

She was to young too be a grandmother.


	5. Scared

**b Chapter 5: /b**

i _A few years had gone and come around  
We were sitting at our favourite spot in town  
And you looked at me, got down on one knee _/i

Buffy snuggled further into William's chest as they lay on the couch that evening, watching the first Pirates of the Caribbean movie, The Curse of the Black Pearl. Buffy felt her eyes flutter closed briefly as William's fingers ran through her freshly washed golden locks.

He had placed a blanket over their lower limbs only minutes before and already, Buffy felt the warmth engulf her.

"Pet?"

"Mmm," Buffy hummed, head shifting to roll onto William's chest. "You keep doing that and I'm going to fall asleep before the movie finishes."

"I was thinking…" William's hands stopped stroking Buffy's hair. "The fight we had the other day…"

"I don't want to talk about it." Buffy sat up and met his gaze. "It's over and we're all good now, right?"

William shifted his gaze to the telly.

"Right?"

"We need to talk about it, pet." Buffy had shifted and now sat next to William instead of lying on top of him.

"W-what do you want to know? Why I'm afraid to settle down and have a family with you? Why I'm going to be a horrible mother? Why I can't stand the thought of losing you but all I seem to be doing these days is pushing you further away. God…I-I'm killing our marriage." Buffy cried, running a hand through her hair.

"It takes two people to make a marriage work, pet. I haven't exactly been the best at that either. To really move forward with our lives, we need to fix what's wrong. We've been together for years. Been in love for years, pet." William smiled, cupping her cheek. "Why are you so afraid to settle down and have kids with me?" he whispered.

"Because you didn't want that…with me," Buffy whispered, her voice cracking.

_i "My period, I…It's late!" _

"_I'm sure it's nothing," _

"_I might be pregnant!"_

"_If you are, we'll fix it. Have the pregnancy terminated," /i_

"Of course I want to have kids with you! Why would you-" William's eyes widened in realisation. "Buffy…That was years ago!" William met her tear filled eyes.

"I thought that if you didn't want that with me then… Then you wouldn't want to have a family with me now." Buffy cried, her shoulders shaking with the force of her tears.

"Are you daft?" William asked wrapping an arm around her shoulders and bringing her in for a hug. "Do you remember what I said to you the day I asked you to marry me?"

"How could I forget?" Buffy smiled softly at the memory. They had been at their favourite restaurant and had just finished dessert when William had gone down on one knee in front of the whole restaurant and proposed to her.

_i "I've loved you, Buffy Summers, from the very first day I laid eyes on you. You're my light, pet. When everything around me seems to be going dark and pulling me down, you're there, making me smile. I can't imagine living the rest of my life without having you by my side. I want to make you smile when you're sad…and carry you around when you're pregnant with our babies and too tired to walk." He let out a laugh. "You're my only." William pulled a small velvet box out from his pocket and opened it. " And always, pet. Will you marry me?" /i_

"I love you, pet. I don't know what I'd do if we weren't together." William kissed the top of her head.

"Me either," Buffy whispered.

"First thing on Monday I'm going to talk to my boss and cut back my hours."

"You don't have to do that.." Buffy said, sitting up.

"I've been spending too much time at work. I hardly get to see you, luv. It's not healthy for our relationship, for our marriage."

Buffy was fiddling with her hands, refusing to meet William's eyes.

"I need to tell you something," she whispered, glancing at him out of the corner of her eye. "And before you say anything, I j-just wanted to tell you I'm scared shitless." Buffy's eyes were beginning to well with tears.

"Pet, what's wrong?"

"The other day, w-when you came home from work and we got into that fight." She took a deep breath. "You told me that we weren't working out-"

"I said a lot of things I didn't mean…" William whispered, suddenly very nervous.

"You yelled." A tear slipped down her cheek as she continued to fiddle with her hands. "A-and slammed the door when you left to go to the bar."

"Buffy…"

"I'd been feeling sick for a couple of weeks." She met his eyes briefly.

"Food poisoning. I remember, you told me."

"W-when you left I went to see a doctor."

She still wasn't meeting his gaze and William was getting more nervous by the minute.

"You're scaring me, pet. What's wrong? Are you ok?"

"I'm ok…Scared out of my mind, b-but other than that I'm ok." William's hands shook as he reached out and clasped Buffy's hands in his.

"Tell me what's wrong."

"My mood swings have been getting worse." Buffy let out a laugh. "Not the usual PMS kind of mood swings I usually get but I…" She met his gaze. "I-I'm pregnant, William," Buffy whispered, not breaking eye contact.

William's mouth hung open in a silent 'o'.

"Pregnant?"

"I'm scared, William. I don't know how to be a mother…I'm still learning how to be a wife. I don't know if I can do this."

"How far along are you?" William asked, flabbergasted.

Pregnant.

Buffy was b **pregnant**. /b

With his child.

The thought made his heart swell with pride and he couldn't stop the goofy grin that spread across his face.

"A-about eight weeks," Buffy whispered, tears slipping down her face.

"Why are you crying?" William smiled, wiping away her tears. "This is wonderful news, pet."

"I don't know how to be a mother. I can't even manage to be a good wife. We've been fighting-"

"You're going to be an amazing mother." William cut her off, cupping her face in his hands. "You were amazing as my girlfriend." He kissed one cheek. "Amazing as my lover." He kissed the other cheek. "And exceptionally amazing as my wife. I couldn't ask for anything more than exactly what you are, pet." William kissed her lightly on the lips. "I haven't been the best husband of late but I'm going to work hard for us, pet. I'm going to cut back my hours at work so I can spend more time with you. It's the way it should be…the way it should have always been."

"William…"

"I'll never stop loving you, even when you're old, grey and wrinkly and can't walk." Buffy let out a laugh and buried herself in Williams hug.

"God, I love you so much."

"I love you too, pet. You'll make an amazing mother, just wait and see." William stood and held out his hand for her to take. The movie completely forgotten, William switched off the TV and led Buffy to their bedroom.

He wrapped his arms around her waist from behind and let his hands rest atop her stomach.

"My baby's in here," he whispered, voice content, a smile on his face.

William was laying light soft kisses down Buffy's neck when she spoke.

"Babies."

"Huh?" William's kisses stopped as he raised his head in confusion.

Buffy turned around and met his eyes, raising her hand and held up two fingers.

"B-babies?"

Buffy nodded shyly and felt her eyes well with tears at the joyous smile that spread across her husbands face.

"I'm terrified."

"Babies….as in two…We're having b **babies**! /b "

Buffy let out a squeal as William's lips crashed down to meet hers in a passionate kiss, his hands travelling down her body to cup her bottom and to pull her flush against his own.

The joyous news had to be celebrated and William knew the perfect way to do it.


	6. We have to celebrate!

__

i Take me back to the time when we walked down the aisle  
Our whole town came and our mamas cried  
You said I do and I did too /i

Buffy let out a laugh as William ran his hands down her stomach causing goosebumps to rise on her skin in their wake.

Youre starting to show, he whispered, a smile playing on the edges of his mouth.

I know. She let out a grin at seeing the entranced look on Williams face as he watched the rise and fall of her stomach with every breath she took.

It scared her a little at how quickly things had picked up over the last 3 months. William had cut back his normal 45-hour working week to 38 hours and spent all the spare time he had with her. Hed stopped going to the pub everyday after work with his colleagues and instead came home to cook dinner.

She couldnt help but still be surprised when she walked through the door after work and found a cooked meal on the table ready for her to eat.

Youre beautiful, William whispered kissing her belly and making his way up her body.

You say that now, Buffy laughed jokingly and wrapped her arms around his waist. But Im going to get so fat. She sighed, a pout forming on her lips.

Youll still be beautiful to me.

Even when Im as huge as a house and cant see my own feet?

William laughed and nuzzled his nose against hers in a loving caress.

Even when youre as huge as a house and cant see your own feet.

He leant down and captured her lips in a sweet and short kiss.

I dont know if I can do it, Buffy whispered as William rolled to the side, coming to lie next to her.

Buffy-

Shes going to freak out. Im freaking out! Dont laugh at me! Buffy yelled with a pout, playfully smacking him on the arm.

Luv, he smiled slipping his hand into hers and bringing it to his mouth for a chaste kiss. Your mother is going to be so ecstatic that shes not going to care that you didnt tell her earlier.

You really think so? I could have told her when she came ov-

Everything is going to be fine. He dropped a kiss on her forehead before sliding out of their bed and stretching, not caring that he was naked and being blatantly stared at. Now, he grinned and raised his eyebrows suggestively. How about we go have that shower?

Buffys eyes continued to rake up and down his body, as she admired his taunt body and had not heard a word hed said.

Luv?

Hmm?

Buffy shook her head and glanced up to meet his smirking face.

Shower?

...............

I dont think shes squealed this much since I told her we were getting married, Buffy whispered into Williams ear, smiling when her mother let out another Oh my God.

William laughed and kissed Buffy on the neck, his thumb caressing the top of her hand that was entwined with his own.

We have to celebrate! Joyce was ecstatic, her grin reaching from ear to ear. We have to go shopping for- her eyes widened as it finally hit her. Twins! You have to get double of everything. Have you told your parents yet? Her question was aimed at William who nodded in response. Get your things, were going to celebrate. Wheres the phone? Ill call your parents to-

I think shes more excited than I was, William whispered as he watched Joyce snatch the phone from its holder and punch numbers in at double speed.

Its kind of scary. Buffy met his eyes and squeezed his hand as her mother spoke enthusiastically into the phone making plans for that evening.

Twins, I know! Joyce grinned. Ill be over in the next hour to pick you up, were going to celebrate. Yes, bring Giles, Hell you can bring everyone, Im so excited!

Mom! Buffy yelled at the mention of everyone.

Bloody hell.

What? Joyce asked as she placed the phone back into its rightful place.

You better not invite b **everyone, **/b the wedding was bad enough-

What do you mean bad enough, it was a beautiful wedding.

It was, pet.

Except for the part where you practically invited the whole town! Buffy replied shakily as she stood. Im freaking out enough as it is, I cant handle having everyone-

Honey, Joyce smiled, embracing her daughter in a hug. I was only kidding. Its only going to be Jenny and Giles.

Buffy nodded and tucked a few stray hairs behind her ears before turning to face William.

Well take it a day at a time, yeah. William reached out and slipped his arms around her waist and dropped a kiss on her shoulder.

Im so excited! Joyce grinned, Buffy and William jumping slightly at the tone of her voice.

We know! they said in union.

Im going to go get ready and then Ill go pick your parents up. She met Williams eyes as she grabbed her purse and keys. Ill meet you at Grastinis in an hour. Without giving William or Buffy the chance to reply, Joyce quickly slipped out the front door.

You better not leave my side tonight. Buffy turned around and wrapped her arms around Williams neck. This is going to be a nightmare. She buried her head in his chest.

......................

i _Take me home where we met so many years before  
We'll rock our babies on that very front porch  
After all this time, you and I _/i __

Im stuffed, Buffy moaned as she rubbed her belly, climbing into the hammock with William and leaning back into his waiting arms.

She was emotionally and physically drained. Her mother had stayed true to her word and kept the celebratory party on the low down. Buffy and William had met with her mother and his parents at Grastinis, the best Italian restaurant in town, to celebrate.

Shed never smiled so much or eaten so much in her entire life.

That, he laughed, was one good meal.

No more talk of food. Buffy moaned, laying her head on his shoulder and adjusting the book in her hands. I think I might explode.

They were lying in the hammock on the front porch, wrapped in each others arms as the light breeze rocked them.

Ive never seen you eat that much before, he laughed, stroking her hair.

Oh, I dont know. Buffy smiled. Remember our one year anniversary?

I thought I was going to be sick.

I remember. Buffy laughed, playing with the page edges of the album in her hands. William brought his hands from around her to open the album and flick through its pages.

Each photo had captured moments in his life he never wished to forget. Each picture held a memory, all of which centred around Buffy, the woman he was going to spend the rest of his life worshiping.

There had been times in their relationship when things had gotten tough; hed said and done a number of things to her that he wished he could take back or rewind time and do things over again but he couldnt.

He thought back to the last few months and how his work and drinking had blinded him to what was right in front of him the whole time.

Do you think well ever be that happy again?

William was brought out of his musings by Buffys whisper. She was holding the album up on her stomach, stroking the outline of his laughing face in the photo.

Theyd gone to the beach with her mother one sunny Saturday afternoon. Hed thrown her over his shoulder and carried her down to the water, much to her dismay, and dumped her in the ocean. Hed almost fallen over in laughter when shed come sputtering up for air, her hair a tangled mess strewn across her face.

I am that happy.

Buffy turned around in his arms to meet his eyes.

Being with youThere are always going to be times when we want to strangle each other, pet. He laughed as she raised an eyebrow, a smile playing on the edges of her mouth. But I wouldnt have it any other way. I cant picture my life without you in it.

You know youre my only and always, right? Buffy whispered.

Her answer came in the sweet form of a kiss, sweet and tender. The old worn out photo album clattered to the floor as their kiss became heated. Theyd always have the memories, pictures to show them their past and help remind them how theyd gotten to where they were.

William grinned at Buffys squeal as he stood with her in his arms, her legs wrapping around his waist as he made his way inside and up the stairs to their bedroom. Their lovemaking was sweet and slow, William smiling down at her afterwards as he ran a hand down her swollen belly, thinking of what lay nestled inside.

It was no surprise at Buffys baby shower that Joyce presented her with another photo album. The first photo this time, however, was a picture of the happy couple wrapped in each others arms. Williams hands lay on Buffys very pregnant belly and they were wearing matching smiles that stretched from ear to ear.

Joyce had written a few words underneath the picture.

i You_ll be eighty-seven and He'll be eighty-nine and hell still look at you like the stars that shine in the sky, oh my my my... /i_


End file.
